Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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