We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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