i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
it's like heaven, but drunker
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
