watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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