there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
The best revenge is premature balding
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
