I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
