Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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