i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
