At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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