Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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