I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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