It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
