Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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