what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Randomize
