Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
