but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
How external is "for external use only"?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Randomize
