I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
My boob is missing a layer of skin
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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