I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
you will always have a special place in my vag
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
