Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
