Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
