PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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