So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Randomize
