Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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