She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
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