he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
