i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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