My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
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