It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Randomize
