Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
