I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
smell my finger.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
