so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
