at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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