We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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