Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Dicks are not precious.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
