I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
