Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
