i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
