I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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