This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
