I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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