i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
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