Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
