yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
