I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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