super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
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