i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Randomize
