There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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