You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Randomize
