I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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