Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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